A Turning Point Perhaps

I'm always looking for Signs to Help Me in Life.

I voraciously read Billboards. Numberplates. Newspaper & Gossip Magazine Headlines. I'll walk past a newstand & catch the front cover of 'New Idea' with a picture of Angelina Jolie with the headline, 'How She's Coping' . And then I'll ask myself, 'How Am I Coping?'

Sometimes I don't like the answer I give.

Now I'm turning to Supermarket Items for guidance. Yesterday, I was trawling through the Shampoo Section at Woolworths & I found 'Turning Point'.

Yes, A Definite Sign, I thought.

I hope that my hair is not at a Turning Point, though. I couldn't stand it. It's all I've got left.

Today, Gaby, one of my younger students, put up her hand in class to ask a question.

'What is your Real Hair Colour, Ms?' she inquired.

I inwardly nearly blew a gasket

'Gaby', I said, 'I, am a Freak of Nature. I know it's hard to believe, but this is my natural hair colour. OK, I spray the top with a little 'Sunsilk Sunnin' whatever it's called, but I'm still Basically Blond'.

Everyone yawned.

The Hierarchy of Men

Yesterday, someone (Darla) noticed that I'd written on the whiteboard 'Hierarchy of Men'. She wondered what I meant.

Yes, it does sound intriguing, doesn't it? What could Unlucky In Love Middleagedteacher be telling a pack of Back-achingly Bored seventeen year old girls about Men?

'Girls.....if there's one thing I want you to remember in all the myriad things that I've taught you is that there's such a thing as a Hierarchy of Men. The Man at the Top, for example, Jeremy Northam shown in this photo in his role as Mr. Knightley in 'Emma' is  Such a Man. Perhaps Richard Armitage as Mr. Whatsisname in 'North & South' is another. But  Colin Firth as Mr Darcy is the Exemplar.

These are the Men you must aim for Girls. Don't accept anything less.'

Of course I didn't say anything of the sort. I was just ranting on about Men in 'Emma'. 

But as I was writing that little imagined piece of advice, it occurred to me that that was exactly the sort of Ridiculous Mumbo Jumbo that passed as Received Wisdom when I was young. Stuff like,

' You can tell the character of a Man by the quality of the shine on his shoes'.

But now I've started to think more about The Hierarchy. I can see hundreds of men, all standing on top of  each other's shoulders, perhaps with a slight lean to them, looking like A Human Leaning Tower of Pisa. 

Who would be placed in the middle? Maybe Reliable Chartered Accountants and Suburban Dentists. 

And what about the Bottom? I shudder to think.

Freedom from Magazines

I know this sounds mean, but I kind of find the current financial downturn slightly comforting because it mirrors my own personal financial downturn which sadly has nothing to do with World Markets.

Gone are the days when I'd come home every second day with a fresh new magazine to pour over. I now only buy one magazine a month, the Magnificent 'World of Interiors', which I've been religiously buying since the eighties. 

Nowadays, I read magazines at 'Borders' which is like my local library, or I read or pilfer them from my local cafe, 'Zinc', or I drag them out of the garbage bins in the basement of my apartment building.

Don't feel sorry for me, though. I just love not buying mags. It's True Freedom At Last! 

And I love reading them for free or stealing them or finding them in the rubbish. It's like a little gift from the Universe.

Anyway, I was frantically reading a dog-eared copy of 'New York' mag this morning at 'Zinc' while I was waiting an eternity for my takeaway latte, & I found this page featuring Patti Lupone, a Broadway star who is not really known in Australia as Broadway isn't here. 

I just loved her saying, 'I could see the writing on the wall, so I started writing on the wall'. 

I  wish I had said it. 

16 Random Things: No. 8, What Cartoon Character Do I Most Resemble?

Some time back I was tagged on my flickr site to reveal 16 Random Things About Myself. I was absolutely thrilled. Finally, I was Asked!

I wished it was 100, nay, 200 Random Things. In fact, I might decide to  keep the Random Thingy going indefinitely. 

Some people may feel that my attitude reveals a Chronic Case of Oversharing or maybe a Thoroughly Undeserved Sense of Self-Importance. Or Rampant Ego Inflation. Or a Desperate Need for Adulation & Acknowledgment. Or Flagrant Low-Self-Esteem. 

I'm probably all of those things & much much more. 

But the Cartoon character that I feel  most sums me up, is Donkey in 'Shrek'.  You know, he's the one jumping up & down on the spot at the back of the group that shouts out to Shrek, 'Pick Me! Pick Me!' 

I just want to be noticed. And to tell anyone who'd listen the Story of My Life in a Thousand Chapters. 

So I've just revealed Random Thing Number 8. If you could be bothered reading the first seven, just click on my flickr photostream.

Oh, you may be wondering why I posted that pic of me lovingly gazing up at the word 'Fearless'. It's because that's what I'm aiming to be. I don't want to be a Evil Knieval or a Harry Houdini or the type of person who would do my own stunts in a film or anything, but someone who was Quietly Fearless. 

Wouldn't that  be Fantastic?