Monday, January 20, 2014

Summer Play Clothes Round Up

Aloha! Like Sands through the Hourglass, the Summer Holidays are sadly slipping away.
This time next week I'll be packing up my Play Clothes & dragging out my Work Clothes which  sounds awful but it's not really.
To be honest, I'm quite looking forward to getting slightly zchoosched up in all the freshly thrifted designer clothes & shoes that I've been obsessively buying from my favourite charity shoppe, Bednobs & Broomsticks.
But for now, I'd like to take a wistful look back at the wonderful array of both Fab & Dubious Play Clothes that Maeflower & I have worn over the summer.

 First up is Maeflower wearing a brand new white cheesecloth top she purchased, along with a whole load of other beach gear in a lightning raid of one of those ubiquitous Surf shoppes that are everywhere with names like  Surfaction or is it Surfiction? Or maybe Surfriction? This particular shoppe was located in the Central Coast town of Woy Woy which wins the award of being the town that most resembles the sound of its name. 
In the first photo, in a desperate bid to avoid  harsh UV rays, she has half-buried herself in the sands of Macmaster's Beach. I do approve of the slightly rock'n roll cowboy hat which I would love to wear myself but won't for fear of looking like I'm stuck in a Rolling Stones Concert Time Warp 1973. Or maybe Billy Ray Cyrus 1990. Who could ever forget 'Eacky Beaky Heart'?
Quelle Horreur.
The white cheesecloth shows its versatility as a Shopping Outfit in the second photo. Mae is off to cruise the aisles at Aldi, the Supermarket of Supermarkets which always has a massive array of what appears to be German Sweet Treats with Unprounceable Names that look like Dog Biscuits with icing. She's teamed the top with an on-trend see-through pleated skirt from The Salvos Store in Umina, pronounced You-Mine-Na, another town that closely resembles the sound of its name. The Aldi eco-friendly shopping bag nicely sets off the whole look.
As Guiliana from Fashion Police always says, "Per-Fection-Dot-Com".

And now Back to Me.
In the photo above, I'm sitting outside a retro roadside bric a brac shop in  East Gosford, a town that is as no nonsense as its name, wearing a many layered beach outfit - swimsuit, slightly slutty dress, tee shirt & top. Not to mention the armful of Toy Louis Louis bangles that I nearly lost later in the day when I was  unceremoniously dumped by a wave. About the only thing that was easy to remove was the Toy Chanel plastic flip flops which I totally adore even though one of the double c logos is missing from one flip flop. But life is a daily procession of loss.

I was thrilled at the confident way that Maeflower managed to turn her Chanel 2.55 into a Beach Accessory. Who knew that this iconic bag can  move from the boudoir to the boardroom to the shopping mall & finally to the Beach so seamlessly?


 Back to me again.
In the photo below, I'm not showing off the gigantic bruise I got when I fell over trotting through the Bouddi National Park on my way to Macmaster's Beach. Nor am I showing off the effect that boxing has had on my upper arms. (Sadly, not that much)
NO, I'm showing off what happens to hair when you spray it rigid with hairspray & then get dumped in the surf & then you don't bother washing it.
Rip Van Winkle Bed Hair.

 Meanwhile, back at the East Gosford Strip Mall, Maeflower has gone all Flower Child in a pair of tie-dyed poo-catching-pantaloons thrifted from 'Bednobsetc' that she has teamed with a pink boob tube. The parasol was another innovative attempt to avoid harmful UV rays as it was yet another heatwave. Thanks Global Warming.
I couldn't resist calling her top a 'boob tube', even though I'm almost entirely certain that it's not technically one. But, what the hell, I'm still on holidays. I can say slutty & poo & boob & maybe even Vomit or Bile if I feel the urge. Next week I'll go back to being Stitched Up Again.
BTW, if you look closely at the photo, you may notice that the name of the shoppe on the left is called 'Whoops'. I'll leave it up to you to imagine what it might sell.

Next to 'Whoops' was The Salvos Store which proved to be an Alladin's Cave of treasures. As Maeflower said, it was like no hipsters had been near the joint for about a year, so we had free reign to clean the place out. We bought:
1.  a globe of the world that appeared to have some of the countries in the wrong place but you could hardly tell;
2. fabulously painted decorative Chinese plates that looked perfect for my Sunday Nite Dinners until I read a sticker on the back  that said 'food should Not be consumed on this plate'. Pourquoi, I wondered? Toxic fumes? Lead poisoning?
3. An ancient tray that said "Gosford - the Jewel of the Central Coast" & many many other items including this fab long skirt that Mae is wearing below, still with the tags on.
Note that in the photo that Tacitus is closely attending to the Weber Barbeque that Santa gave him for Xmas.

 On Boxing Day , heatwave conditions forced us to go to Erina Fair Shopping Mall. It was the only way we could get cool.  I managed to purchase some actual New Clothes from 'Cotton On', a shoppe that I'm weirdly keen on even though it's for a much younger demographic & there are no second hand items for sale.
I'm wearing a strange concoction - a dress that looks more like a nighty which I've teamed with a loose top that probably has no business being near the dress.
 I was so thrilled that George Kotsiopoulos from Fashion Police pronounced that Animal Prints were now Officially Neutrals. Thank God.
The necklace, from 'Diva', still one of my favourite Mall Shoppes, is an ornate sea horse.
Talking of jewelry, right now I'm totally gagging for those 'Celine' cuffs that were popular ages ago but that I've only now got up to speed on. I spent hours last nite scouring the net for some convincing replicas, or even the Real Things, but to no avail.
Occasionally, a thrifted item can be an Epic Fail. Here is an example, below.
Whilst trawling through the racks of clothes at The Salvos, I was captivated by the ornate beading featuring a snake as a centrepiece on this rather skimpy little dress that I purchased for Maeflower.
Sadly, once we got it home, we realised that there would be no possible occasion outside of Halloween, which we don't really celebrate in Australia, where this dress would be appropriate. Maybe cleaning out the garage.

 Lastly, on the last day of our Beach Holiday, I'm wearing a thrifted Lisa Ho handkerchief hem see through dress in Neutral Animal Print.  I wore the purple nighty underneath because I think the best thing a woman of sixty can do is cover up unless of course you're Christie Brinkley, who was photographed recently at some Swimsuit Model Do, above.
I hate to be picky, but that dress is a bit too long in the sleeves, & the shoulder pads make her look like she's got really pointy shoulders. And her hair has about every colour of blonde imaginable in it.
But maybe I've been watching Fashion Police for too long.


Lastly, lastly, I'm waiting for a latte to arrive at the Macmaster's Beach Surf Life Saving Club cafe, below, wearing a whole mess of jewelry from the Fruits de Mer section of my jewelry collection. I must say that I look a little too Cocktail Partyish for the beach, particularly if I was just about to hop on a paddle board which I wasn't but I would have loved to if I had the necessary skills & equipment.
For all my beach outings, in lieu of wearing an unflattering hat, I wore a blue sarong that doubled as a protective scarf &  head wrapping.