Saturday, February 19, 2011

The Fashionable Classroom

Hello & Welcome to My Fashionable Classroom.
Above, Dear Reader is a wonderful line-up of the Class of 2010's Top Achievers.
Three of them were my students, but sadly I can't take any of the credit, although of course I'd love to.

Here they were last thursday just after a special assembly at school where we honoured them & others.
On the far left is Madeline, who was My Official Wardrobe Diary Classroom Photographer for two years. Sadly, I'm struggling as we speak, to replace her. I just can't find the Right Person: someone who always remembers to stay back after class & take the photo; someone who doesn't suffer from Shaky Hand Syndrome & someone who would rather take my photo than rush off to the next class.
Next, is Emma who is channelling Beach Goddess. Emma is the closest I've ever come to teaching A Saint. One time, I went into meltdown during a lesson when I noticed that the Gold Buckle on my YSL flats had come unstuck. Emma immediately rushed the shoe & Rogue Buckle up to The Art Dept. where she expertly glued it back on. But that's not the reason why she's  a Saint.
Then there's Maddison, who, as a Peroxide Blonde has featured on this blog a number of times. She is brilliant & wonderful & always calm no matter what.
Then there's Me, Middleagedteacher, wearing a thrifted Kate Sylvester dress in a fabric that is trying to look like its Roughly Hewn Leather. I do like this dress, or rather I did before realising that it makes my boobs look like a couple of fried eggs with barbeque sauce poured over them. Perhaps I'm being a Little Harsh. But it's saturday nite & I'm totally boiling hot & I've got 'Billy Eliot' on pause & I'm up to the bit where Billy's Dad belts him up for taking ballet lessons & Billy calls him 'a bastard'  I'm desperate to get back to it.
And I've got three more Stylish Girls to go.
Next is Ali who is Smart & Sassy & funny & out there & will end up running a PR Firm. Rarely, do I make predictions about anyone but I'm sure I'm right. Perhaps I'm becoming Psychic, although I don't want to look like one.
Then there's Bridget, who is channelling Urban Fairytale. Perhaps Gretal, or a Slightly Edgy Little Red Riding Hood without the Red & the Hood. She loved reminding me that when she was in Year 7 I told her, when no one wanted to sit next to her in class, that it appeared that she didn't have any friends. I am absolutely sure I never said that, but she never let me forget it anyway, particularly when she didn't have her homework done.
Lastly is  Georgie, The Deluxe Dux. She completely creamed her HSC Exams, scoring a Premier's Award. She's just come back from overseas, so she's wearing Top Shop with Edgy Librarian's Shoes.
Thank God that's over. I hope I haven't left anybody out.

 Three more snaps of me in the classroom this week.
I'm brandishing a lipstick instead of a whiteboard marker.
Thrifted linen & lace & pearl dress that would have looked good at a Suburban Cocktail Party in the early sixties where they served coloured pickle onions & french onion dip made with 'Continental' Soup Mix. I wonder if anyone remembers those soup sachets?
 Perhaps not.
Also wearing a load of jewels from the 'Fruits de Mere' section of my Jewelry Collection. I'm wearing them to cover up the unsightly rust stains on the front of the dress, which I'm told are impossible to remove. I probably wouldn't be able to remove them anyway, even if you could, because I'm a Bad Laundress.

 This outfit is really Midnite Blue but in the photo looks a strange shade of Perhaps Aubergine.
Ooooo...... talking of Strange, have just watched 'Fashion Police's' coverage of The Grammy's.
Finally, someone copied MY wearing of wings. It was Katy Perry, all done up in 'Armani Prive' complete with a pair of wings. Joan said that it was hard to tell whether it was Haute Couture or a Halloween Outfit. (In case you forgot, I wore black wings to my at-home birthday dinner last year. It's almost worth it for you to trawl through last  March's blog entries to see it again)

Here I am yesterday at the Gates of Hell. I had just finished teaching Lady Macbeth's nasty little speech calling on the spirits to, 'Unsex me here' & pour poison down her hubby's ear. The girls were appalled. Not at me. At Lady Macbeth.
Now it's Back to Billy.

1 comment:

Rebecca said...

I despair of ever commenting "in kind" to your post. Each paragraph is full of its own pearls that leave my fingers speechless.

I DID have a distinct (call it "psychic" - although I don't want to look like one either - experience) revelation that when Joan is no longer with us, you will be her Grammy replacement.

And replacing YOU will be one of those girls - maybe Madeline???

Meanwhile, I hope for you just the Right Person to emerge as the Official Wardrobe Diary Classroom Photographer (OWDCP). (It DOES require quite an unusual skill set...)

BTW, as a clumsy laundress myself, I am pleased to have picked up on your tip for dealing with rust. stains.