Visible Everything Lines

This is, I assure you O Reader, going to be a Blip or is it a Blimp? of a Blog Entry because I only want to say a couple of things:

1. I did soo enjoy getting dear Joan Rivers to be the only person in the History of the World to asked The Queen WHO she was wearing.

And HRH gave a rather surprising answer, I thought. Who would have known that she makes her own clothes? How does she find the time?

2. Visible Everything Line.

To celebrate the re-installing of my Cable TV, I've been watching oodles of The Style Network. What a cast of characters! Let me briefly walk you through two of them:

(a) I've just discovered an intriguing little minx on a reality show called 'Jerseylicious'. Sadly, I don't know her name. But she is perhaps twenty, with long black hair & huge crescent-mooned eyebrows that seem to have separate personalities all of their own. I was Totally Transfixed.

She was telling us that she has graduated from 'The LaToya Jackson L'Ecole de Beaute', which was , 'the Harvard of Beauty Schools'. I was impressed.

(b) Simon Doonan. He's the creative director of 'Barneys' in NYC & loves dispensing hard-hitting, gritty advice on shows about How to Be Glamorous. I actually watched one of them earlier this evening & was told that if I want to be glamorous, I MUST Stop Wearing a Thong. OMG, I didn't know that's all I had to do! What a relief! I must do it immediately.

Simon didn't actually have much to say about the wearing of thongs. He was more interested in Setting us Straight about Visible Panty Lines, which are known in the trade as VPL.

Anyway, while all the other pundits on the show were defaming the VPL, he said that he would MUCH rather See the VPL & have the reassurance that that person was actually wearing panties.

Simon would be hugely relieved to look at me, above (in a thrifted 'Scanlan & Theodore' waay too small dress) & see that the line of Every Single Piece of Underwear I'm wearing is reassuringly visible to anyone within a fifteen metre radius.

That dress is going straight into the bin. But not, the Akira Isogawa offcut that I wore as a scarf. Nor is the Golden Seashell belt or the Toy Ocelot Tights or the slightly rotting 'Bruno Magli' shoes.