Tuesday, September 8, 2009

High Heels & Wet Flounders

Can you guess what kind of a mood I may be in?
I'll tell you - Slightly Edgy.
Perhaps Full of rage. Make that Incandescent Rage.
I feel so fed up that I'd like to slap everyone across the face with a Wet Flounder.

I can see that I've now Officially Gone a Little Too Far. I'll be getting phone calls from concerned friends asking me in the special tone of voice that they reserve for speaking to Wounded Mental Patients if I'm OK.

Actually, I'm fine. It's about time that I got a little angry after the way I've been treated. And don't ask me what I mean by that. Let's just say that I've been treated like Gum on the Sole of my ex-partner's shoe for too too long, which is a fabulous quote from I think Rosanne Arnold. She said it after she broke up with Tom Arnold.
Or maybe Cher said it although I can't think who she was breaking up with. It seems so long since she's been married or been with anybody.
Anyway, it was some celebrity or other.

I've discovered a wonderful way to express rage is by wearing high heels. They make the most angry clacking sound when you walk in them.
This past week we've all been made to do Exam Supervision which means being trapped in the School Hall for fifty-five minutes at a time while a hundred girls sit in rows of desks & suck on their pencils & look worried or bored. We're supposed to 'Invigilate' which means roaming the aisles like a pack of Death Eaters from 'Harry Potter' looking out for potential cheaters.
Honestly, it's worse that a Bad Day in Purgatory.
But I decided to wear my Loudest High Heels to Exam Supervision. I'm sure the sound of me merrily clacking down the aisles like I'm on the runway for Ralph Lauren really sent everyone's nerves on edge. It felt fabulous. And I just loved the pained looks on the faces of my Fellow Colleagues who were also on Supervision with me. They, of course, Tiptoe which I'm never going to do again.

One day soon, I'll turn into Senior Anne of Green Gables.
But not quite Now.
I'm having too much fun with High Heels & Flounders.


zizzi said...

I do love an angry woman at mid-life. So powerful!

I, too, love high heels as you may have guessed because I'm always working on the slightly slutty look. However, a new mid life tragedy has befallen me and that is that my left hip hurts badly when I wear high heels! I am not giving up yet, though. I'm off to a physiotherapist to see if I can get this bad hip corrected so that I can once again wear heels. (But I won't tell the physio. about my motivation.)

Cecilia said...

It's about time! I have been meaning to comment before about how calm you have been about your Ex. I think that you have been amazingly cool about everything. I wish I could be more like you. You are my hero!

Della Street Dreaming said...

Thank you Zizzi & Cecilia! But I'm afraid that Angry Old Boilers are becoming a bit of a cliche nowadays.
thanks Cecilia. One of the great things for me over the past painful year has been writing this blog. It has been amazing! I can't tell you the number of times that I've sat down at the computer & opened up Dear Della & felt completely different at the end!