Christmas Wish List: Number 1.

Ever since Velvet, a wonderful Irish Horse Vet came to my Regular Sunday Dinner last sunday night, I've been desperate for a Companion Miniature Horse. Velvet knows these wondrous creatures who look uncannily like something out of Harry Potter.

Sadly, miniature horses do NOT make Practical Pets if they don't have unlimited access to The Outdoors as apparently, they are NOT amenable to Potty Training. So a small horse couldn't live in an apartment like mine, although Velvet suggested that miniature horses, who incidentally are about the size of a small labrador can be fitted with disposable nappies.

But can you imagine changing the nappies? How would One even attempt to do it?

Its such a pity as I've even got a name picked out: Verdell.

Ever since I fell in love with that little dog called Verdell in the film 'As Good As It Gets' with Jack Nicholson & Helen Hunt, who now looks like an Aged Rodent who's been trapped for too long in a maze, I have wanted to have my own Verdell.

Oh, & Another Thing. I had visions of my Companion Miniature Horse sleeping on the bed like my Dearly Departed black toy poodle Bill used to do every night. Velvet poured cold water on that idea as well. She didn't think small horses did that sort of thing.

But you know what? Suddenly, a dim, far-off memory is coming back to me.

I'm sure some years ago, my great friend & colleague, Trixie told me about a TV programme she saw about how miniature horses were becoming like Guide Dogs & were now able to sit up on planes in their own seat next to their owners.

Perhaps I dreamt this as I don't think that horses see v. well.

Before I sign off, just to prove to you HOW mad I am about horses, I have seen the film 'Seabiscuit' which is the true story of a champion horse from humble beginnings during the Great Depression Many Many times. I once watched it six times on a v. long plane trip to LA.

I swear I did.