It was early on a monday morning about three weeks into the school year when I got a phone call from the Deputy Principal of the local high school. He needed a substitute to replace a teacher who had committed suicide over the weekend. It would only be for a few days until a permanent replacement was appointed.
I was a bit stunned getting the call because the whole time I was at University I was constantly being told there were no jobs for teachers. And so I never bothered paying attention to anything I was supposed to learn. It was all as boring as batshit & they made us play tennis, which was a Hugely Shaming Experience because I couldn't hit the ball over the net. My coach told me that I obviously had a Major Problem with Self-Esteem, which was all the rage at the time. To this day I still can't see the connection between Low Self Esteem & Hand-Eye Coordination.
Anyway, back to the First Monday Morning of my Teaching Career. I reluctantly got dressed in something that I thought looked vaguely teacherly & trudged up to the school. I sat in the corridor outside the Deputy's office watching a depressing cavalcade of staff & students drift by. Finally, the Principal arrived & the deputy stepped out of his office to greet him.
'Mr. Wardrop, have you heard the news about Wally? He finally topped himself on saturday night.'
'That's terrible, Tom. What a loss to the school. Who've you got in to replace him?'
'She's sitting right here, Mr. Wardrop'.
That was the First Big Lesson of my Teaching Life: it doesn't matter how sad everyone is when you leave or die, in the end all they worry about is who's going to replace you.
Life Moves On.
And that's exactly what happened today. Even though I'm slightly sad that I've finished with my Senior Class & that my designated photographer, The Wise Twin, is no more, I had to quickly find a replacement for her from one of my other classes. It wasn't that hard.
I'm quite proud of my whiteboard work which my new photographer, who's yet to get a screen name, captured quite well. In case you were wondering, we were deconstructing the Vile ' Dove' Evolution ad which does a great job in positioning 'Dove' as the bastions of puky Self-Esteem. After showing us a speeded-up version of the transformational effects of make-up, lighting & Photoshop on an average looking young woman, the ad ends with this slogan, 'No wonder our perception of beauty is distorted'.
Give me Estee Lauder any day.